chin up

2011-10-13T22:02:00.002+08:00

My third week of work.. Starting to be more comfortable with the work which is super fast paced!!
Even walking also has to be fast in the office! More at ease with colleagues and they are really funny at times.
Realize that when u realy don't hv much time, one really need to be super flexible, like blogging on my way back like now-.- if not there is forever no time to do a particular task! Tsk.. Opportunities of seed-sowing and caring for people is also AT THAT POINT IN TIME. I can't plan a free slot becoz there isn't luxury of time . But when the prompting comes, just go ahead and do it and I wouldn't feel like there's so many things I haven't do. Super out of comfort zone but yup learning learning.. I reach pasir ris mrt alr.. Yeah woohoo

2011-10-09T22:59:00.002+08:00

It's just so scary and tiring just to think of what's not done and has to be done...
Days that u just depended on yourself and felt so depressed that you just can't wait to go heaven.
Father Lord let me find rest in You.. The living water that refresh me.
Give me the joy that I need to continue to serve you each day, living in your promises.

Having the confidence that your grace is sufficient, more than sufficient for me.

2011-09-07T00:03:00.002+08:00

Thank you God for ur faithfulness.
I've forgiven:)
let me be recouncile to you

The test is painful but it truly shows how great u are in my life.
People may think I'm illogical but I think I hv found the joy in you amidst pain.

Clarice jiayou!
:)

2011-08-26T00:09:00.002+08:00

I wish I could just fast-forward time and stop emoing.
Moments like these are so unbearable:'(

alright sleep sleep sleep.

My God help me in my distress!!

2011-08-25T00:14:00.002+08:00

Withdrawal symptoms kicks in.
at different times of the day.
Coincidentally , saw my crusade frens and they ask abt him. I just told them we are not togt alr.
Awkward. I have to laugh it off.

Luckily God is gracious to me to keep my mind occupied during this time i got a job to look forward to. Think i can work 12 hours a day.. no problem. Just soak myself in the pool of work. Quite excited actually. I still left a medical check up to clear.
My boss ask me to get an english name for easy identification in my job.
My mum suggested Mary. hmmm... Mary Koe?
Suddenly just so glad that my mum didn't manage to sabo me when i was young. Must really thank my dad for this.
(No offense to all the existing Mary...Your mum still loves you loads!! :x)

How about.....
Crunchy Koe ???
haha.

2011-08-23T23:33:00.002+08:00

Re-posting this again... a reminder for me.

Relationship dialectics

1) Autonomy/connection- desires to be separate , on the one hand and to be connected, on the other, opposition of which creates tension. Because we want to be deeply linked to others, we cherish spending time with our intimates, sharing experiences and feeling connected. At the same time , each of us needs an independent identity. We don't want relationships to swallow our individuality, so we seek distance, even from our intimates.

2) Novelty/predictability-opposition of the desire for familiar routines and desire for novelty. We like a certain amount of routine to provide security and predictability in
our lives. Yet too much routine is boring so we seek novel experience to introduce variety in customary routine.

3) Openness/closeness-desires for openness in tension with the desire for privacy. While being open and honest is desired, complete openness would be intolerable.

--Communication Mosaics

Anyway.... this sat
specs? fan tree? screaming hi-5 ? or heart?
Better read up more man!!

2011-08-23T22:45:00.005+08:00

Thank God for the encouragement and support of awesome family and friends during this period. Even my sister called me to cheer me up ( I can't believe this!!!). Not that my sis is mean/bad but it's super very not her to do that.
Without all of u, i will be down down down down.

Fall out of love, jobless , aimless , in debt.
All happen at once.
Sleep in tears , wake up in tears , interview with tears.

Thank God for ur providence, grace and faithfulness.
:)

i know u have and will continue to see me through it all.

Love,
crunchy<3

2011-08-07T02:23:00.004+08:00

My dad was right.
I was complacent.
God despise the complacent but exalts the humble.
It wasn't comfortable to listen because the truth is painful.

But i'm really thankful for my dad.
Sometimes u really wish people will point that out to you.
Your blind spot and weaknesses.
But if it's people who is not close who says that to me, i MIGHT be offended and feel judged because i think the person don't even know me well. However people whom you know who really cares about you and are geniunely concern about you, you know what they say is really for the best of you.
I thank all those people whom God placed in my life who geniunely cares about me.

It become a startling reminder that before i correct anyone, does the person feel love and concern from me or felt judged by me?
If it's the latter, it really does backfire as the person will be super defensive, miss the point where i'm coming from and even hates me. Bearing hatred leads to other more repercussion. Though sometimes by God's grace ultimately the person still knows u care, but that's after a long painful period of reconcilation.

Anyway the main point is,
a broken and contrite heart you will not despise.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.
Hebrews 4:12

2011-07-09T02:22:00.002+08:00

Scholars everywhere through the 'networking session' after the talk.
somehow everyone is introduced by their name followed by their designation/company.

I can't really remember what all the speaker has just shared.

If there's one thing to remember..

'If you are on the wrong track, no matter how fast you run, all ur efforts are wasted'

the right track to begin well.

The foundation with the Lord is the key to guide me to make decisions that pleases Him.

Everyone is vying to jump in to industries where the big buck is.
However it is more important to know ur strengths and weaknesses. Hope I will get the job that I can truly make use of the gifts whatever God has given me and put it to good use.
(everyone definitely has his/her gifting which all plays an important role to complement one another)

"Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid."— Albert Einstein

' God has called me to be in the full time ministry, that's why I'm in MTI ' --- Ng Ming Jie ( I hope he strongly believes in that:x)

2011-07-08T00:09:00.003+08:00

Playing with baby nephew aven is easy, fun and enjoyable.
Until u really stay home and take care!!! ARGHHH
I really learn to love and appreciate my mum more. It's like a replay of how i see my mum take care of me when i was a baby. Those familiar old songs from her era and mimicking weird gibberish cum super act-cute sound just to pacify the baby. (Feels weird to see ur mum doing that:x) Of course i will also constantly check with my mum if there is any similarity between me and my nephew in regards to the naughty and irritating behaviors of his. To my absolute horror and disgust, there are indeed some similarities, hence i really have my hats off her and wonder how she survived taking care of 3 kids during her time.

TOP 5 irritating tasks

1)change diapers (wah this is excruciatingly smelly)and bathe aven (splash the water everywhere and on u coz too excited)
2)Getting him to sleep thru the whole night is as if u want his life man. (He cries so jialat till your neighbours all think u are abusing him)
3)preventing aven from pulling down ur specs/pushing the fan/chair that will fall on him /preventing him from putting things in the mouth/ preventing him from eating ur MSG laden food/ preventing him from touching fragile/hot/dirty things
(if only scoldings help)
4)carrying him constantly coz he will feel very insecure and cry if you leave him alone (even if u just want to pee)
5)Having ur eyes on him once his eyes are open (ALL kinds of stunts and stupid things he will do like suddenly lie backwards and hit the floor hard on his head and the next thing u know,....cover ur ears!

HOWEVER i will kind of miss him when i start working.

Miss his laughter (he smiles even u are scolding him since he is only 1 yr old)
Hugging ur leg to follow u wherever u go (so sweet but nt when u are gg to the loo)
His super loud voice ( his parents are nt from china , i still can't figure out why then). Having him wake me up in the morning.
Squeezing his super chubby cheeks and fattty thighs!

The time spent togt will be so much lesser. Awwwww

I LOVE YOU AVEN!!! :)

END OF MY POST

Disclaimer : This post is not supposed to make sense but simply to express my emotional feelings and irrational thoughts for my nephew.

Thank God for him ..a joy to my whole family!!!
Let him know and love YOU.. use him mightily :)

2011-07-06T01:35:00.001+08:00

Sometimes , it's really not wise to participate in CERTAIN topics that even the bible scholars/critics/christians are still debating on and can't have a uniform conclusion.

So what if one seems to 'win' the discussion , it doesn't even edify anyone.

If feelings are hurt during/after the discussion , it is really SO MUCH not worth it.

2011-06-27T01:16:00.002+08:00

So what do u want to work as?
When is your next job interview?
You having holidays now?
Are you working now?
Which company do you want to go to?
Huh? Then why do you study chemistry?

Actually there is nothing wrong with the nature of all these questions.
Everyone is concerned. I would ask too:x

But it's really annoying if everyone who meets u ask you any of the above.

Then you overhead ur sister telling ur mum:
'huh? She still looking for job?
I got a job secured even before my graduation'

Your mum nags at you every single day for not finding a job.
Your bf everyday tells u how exciting his job is (i'm happy for u really)

Not that I'm anxious for jobs but It seems everyone is reminding me
I need to get a job ASAP
Either Asians are super hardworking.
Or Qc is a lazy bum. :/
(plus results really chui can't even get interview... Arghh!!!!!)

this is not a complaining session blog post but a thanksgiving entry to give thanks to God for a job that I will get. (for whatever it is)
With full confidence that the Lord has a plan for me in advance, I hereby give thanks to you in advance and marvel at your wondrous plan for me.:)
the same Lord who brought me through my horrendous-FYP days
the same Lord who recovered my countless wallets and hps
.
.
.(countless thanks later)
the same Lord who brought the Israelites out of Egypt.
the same Lord who send His Son Jesus to die for our sins
the same Lord who loves us even though we are #*%£<£~£
the same Lord yesterday, today and forever.

Great is thy faithfulness:):):):):):)
Amen!:)
felt my burdens lifted instantaneously at this point in time.

It seems the latter is

2011-05-05T22:25:00.002+08:00

God indeed has answers and promises for the many 'feels' we have. No wonder we must always refer to the LIFE MANUAL (BIBLE) to live out our life. This is not just some intellectual philosophy or some pathetic consoling words that human minds come up with to deceive themselves but really words that have the POWER and the ability to transform. Afterall our God is a God that doesn't look at things like how humans do but He looks into our hearts and loves us beyond what we can conceive.

Lord, I feel..(Saw this from http://encouragingbiblequotes.com/versesifeela.html)

Beaten...yet
You have made me more than a conqueror (Rom 8:37).
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us

Bound....yet
You are my deliverer (Rom 11:26).
And so all Israel will be saved, as it is written: "The deliverer will come from Zion; he will turn godlessness away from Jacob.

Confused....yet
You are my counselor (Isa 9:6).
For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, [a] Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

A failure....yet
You have made me an overcomer (1 Jn 5:4).
For everyone born of God overcomes the world. This is the victory that has overcome the world, even our faith

Fearful....yet
You did not give me a spirit of fear, but of power, of love, andof a sound mind (2 Tim 1:7).
For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.

Friendless....yet
You are a friend who sticks closer to me than a brother (Prov 18:24).
A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.

In darkness....yet
You are a light unto my path and a lamp unto my feet (Ps 119:105).
Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path.

Lonely.....yet
You promised never to leave me nor forsake me (Heb 13:5).
Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you;never will I forsake you."

Misjudged....yet
I'm accepted and approved by You (Eph 1:4).
For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love

Poor....yet
You supply all my need according to Your riches in glory (Phil 4:19).
And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.

Sick....yet
You are the Lord who heals all my diseases (Ps 103:3).
…who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases,

Troubled....yet
You are my peace (Jn 14:27).
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you asthe world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.

Unclean....yet
You are the purifier and refiner of my life (Mal 3:3).
He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver; he will purify theLevites and refine them like gold and silver. Then the LORD will havemen who will bring offerings in righteousness,

Vulnerable....yet
You are my strength and my strong tower (Ps 18:2).
The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn [a] of my salvation, my stronghold.

Worthless....yet
You see me as a pearl of great price (Matt 13:46).
When he found one of great value, he went away and sold everything he had and bought it.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

For Each Negative Thing We Say to Ourselves,God Has A Positive Answer For It.

You say: "It's impossible"
God says: "All things are possible" (Luke 18:27)
Jesus replied, "What is impossible with men is possible with God."

You say: "I'm too tired"
God says: "I will give you rest" (Matthew 11:28-30)
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.

You say: "Nobody really loves me"
God says: "I love you" (John 3:16 & John 13:34)
For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.
A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.

You say: "I can't go on"
God says: "I will direct your steps" (Proverbs 3:5-6)
Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.

You say: "I can't do it"
God says: "You can do all things" (Philippians 4:13)
I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

You say: "I'm not able"
God says: "I am able" (II Corinthians 9:8)
And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all thingsat all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every goodwork.

You say: "It's not worth it"
God says: "It will be worth it" (Romans 8:28)
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

You say: "I can't forgive myself"
God says: "I FORGIVE YOU" (I John 1:9 & Romans 8:1)
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.

You say: "I can't manage"
God says: "I will supply all your needs" (Philippians 4:19)
And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.

You say: "I'm afraid"
God says: "I have not given you a spirit of fear" (2Timothy 1:7)
For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.

You say: "I'm always worried and frustrated"
God says: "Cast all your cares on ME" (I Peter 5:7)
Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

You say: "I don't have enough faith"
God says: "I've given everyone a measure of faith" (Romans 12:3)
For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you.

You say: "I'm not smart enough"
God says: "I give you wisdom" (I Corinthians 1:30)
It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for uswisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption.

You say: "I feel all alone"
God says: "I will never leave you or forsake you" (Hebrews 13:5)
Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you"

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A few more days to my report submission and exam.
I can finally cease to be anti-social and come out from my ntu cave SOON
I'm rushing like mad.
like mad.
mad.

CAN'T WAIT!!!!

:)

2011-05-02T22:46:00.002+08:00

Today is eventful.
The time of the month has come plus a little of food poisoning(after eating tiong food?) ok i better stop being so biased against the tiongs. We got to love ALL people.

Anyway the pain was excruciating.
I laosai, vomitted twice and almost fainted in hall toilet.

I was bathing after the mess (vomit + laosai). Then suddenly i felt like fainting because my stomach was really painful, my eyes could only see 2 colours.
Praying like mad because I know if i faint in hall nobody will know since i never even talk to my roomie and my parents wouldn't call me. Matt also won't know where i go.
And if i will to faint and discovered NAKED, that is even worse.

"NTU undergraduate fainted in cubicle while showering and discovered NAKED N days later"

I can already imagined the news headline.
I struggled with all my willpower and unceasing prayer to wear my clothes though i think i haven't bathe finish (some soap here and there) just to chiong out of the cubicle PROPERLY DRESSED. Even if i have to faint, must faint in a more glamorous way.

Taxi doesn't even accept nets because jurong point is too near my school.
I WALKED to jurong point.
Sway part is all clinics in jurong point are closed.
Don't fall sick on a public holiday.
I only recovered after vomitting a second time.

The rest is history.
But really thank God, if it happens on next mon which falls on my exam date, my paper confirm GG.

:)
Take care of health everyone.

2011-04-30T18:03:00.003+08:00

It's been long since i really slept so long and felt fully relaxed and charged for the final week ahead to study and chiong report.
Great :)

Felt Refreshed!

Really thank God for the people around me.

2011-04-27T14:48:00.002+08:00

it's just 2 weeks away.
my prof is not giving us back the final paper.
I have a very STRONG feeling i failed that terribly.

I really have no motivation to study manz.
It's like u run 2.4kmm then left 100 metres more to go but i started strolling and can't be bothered to run, leaving the time mercilessly ticking pass.

I can take my own sweet time to walk.
The rule is if u failed ur 2.4km, u need to re-run it again.

OK MAYBE that motivates me to RUN.

GOD help me and give me the passion to SPRINT!
(never mind the short legs)

2011-04-11T01:21:00.003+08:00

'Surely he (Jesus) took up our pain
and bore our suffering,
yet we considered him punished by God,
stricken by him, and afflicted.
5 But he was pierced for our transgressions,
he was crushed for our iniquities;
the punishment that brought us peace was on him,
and by his wounds we are healed.'

Isaiah 53:4-5

A love that human mind cannot conceive because it can only come from God Himself.

If there's a chance to see all your non-believers relatives singing amazing grace and hearing the sermon that speaks of God's love, it can only happened in my grandpa's christian funeral.
I was tearing, not just about the grieving part because he(grandpa) has definitely gone to a better place than i'm now. But i was really touched by the scene. The love and opportunity of seed-sowing displayed.

The burden that many had not yet know Him but at the same time knowing He has a wonderful plan and in control warms and comfort my heart deeply. I couldn't help but pray....

2011-04-06T22:33:00.003+08:00

My grandfather had difficulty breathing in the afternoon while i was in lab.
the sadness only creeps in now after i called my mum to know that he passed away.

10.42pm now. I hope u are at a great place now with heavenly Father. No more pain, suffering and sorrows.

Very tired now. i need to wake up early tmr.

good nite world.

'I'm a flower quickly fading, here today and gone tmr. A wave tossed in the ocean. A vapor in the wind. Still u hear me when i'm calling. Lord, u catch me when i'm falling. You told me who i am. I'm yours.'

The Lord who gives peace in the midst of all. I'm glad I find my way back to you.
Your stubborn kid

2011-04-05T23:18:00.001+08:00

In the lab grumbling with my lab mates again. Haix this kind of lamenting and pessimism all day long is bad. I better stop it, not healthy spiritually and definitely not what I want actually..

The learning lab just called me. I screwed up the phone interview but it's ok with every interview that comes, it will equip me better in the future man.

I just shifted in to my hall 2 days back. My roomie is quiet and a nice person:). How do I know? Our conversation goes like this 'hey I'm back!' , roomie turn and smile at me. 'yo I'm gg to bathe now'. Roomie turn and smile. Roomie says, 'i'm going to switch off the lights alr u ok?' me turned to her and say, 'ya sure!'.. Haha typical conversation. I felt like I got 3 & a half hour extra each day becoz I stayed in hall. Rocks totally.But there I go, squandering every single second mercilessly online haha. Otaku, yes that's the word to describe me now.

Matt is still in his lab now my goodness. Chemical engineering sucks too even though my course sucks as well. Ok I catch myself complain again. If I live in OT days during Moses' day would hv been struck down by lightning. Complain complain complain

Random thoughts : J. Lo.. The noisy ex roomie, Janice loh where uuuu haha!
I miss Matty!!! So near yet so far.I think baby aven forgets me alr. Arghh sad:( he can forget his mother , what more me. I shall go back and pinch his cheeks.Howwww my lab expt is killing me each day. No results. I just want to graduate. Very sick of it. Repeating day by day. Meaningless.I want to eat sashimi.Sashimi buffet Nowwwww.I miss hanging out with people that I used to.Meet my prof tmr again. I can alr anticipate what he's gg to say tmr. 'good good, try again'. If only he doesn't say this to everyone.I want to read the bible. To hear God and listen to Him. The rebellious me.

Long story.
Good night world!
K.O

Crunch iPhone

2011-03-19T01:54:00.003+08:00

Laughter to relieve stress?
HaahahahahahahahahahHahahhahaAhahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
if it works?

Actually nope

dun try

2011-03-15T00:45:00.002+08:00

Tonight it struck me again.
If I REALLY know who my God is, I wouldn't be so faithless

Bimbotic fears
inadequacy
'square' thinking
subjected to pressure around

I'm procrastinating the process
but it's time to get out of comfort zone.( how old am I? Still talking abt comfort zone talk)
Rewiring and renewing of mind

the battle within nobody understands
but it's ok everyone has their own to fight

source of hope?
Christ has alr won the battle of life

1am
:)

2011-02-07T22:44:00.002+08:00

One whole day of labwork wasted..

Got no one to ask and my mentor is overseas

And time is passing fast to meet deadlines

exasperated!

And finally got one fierce but nice graduate student( I dun know how does fierce and nice goes togt but he's indeed both)
In that sense he can one moment raise his voice at me and the other moment TRYing to tell jokes.
I usually can't catch it on time as I can't differentiate whether isit a joke or suan.-.-'..
And that makes me more stress coz if I din laugh at his jokes on time the atmosphere will be tense coz only two of us in the lab.
This is really a skill to learn ' how to laugh immediately after someone scolds u'.

ok abt the helpful part( to comfort myself so I can go back to lab tmr happier than today)
I really learn ALOT from him that my mentor din teach or assume I know when I know nuts abt it.
An independent environment has its prices to pay..
Ask too much qns they say u too dependent and black face ask me read more journals, dun ask qns I jialat coz I really know nothing coz too technical

But this graduate student really zai..thank God for him. My mentor MIA-ing
Hope I can survive thru this humbling experience.
Be more THICK-SKIN and learn MORE, MORE , MORE
^^ YAY

2010-12-26T23:54:00.004+08:00

Christmas is over
yet it didn't felt like christmas.
haha hear this from so many people

haha me tooooo
but come to think of it , what will make christmas 'christmasy'?

hmmmm...
carols?
greetings?
presents?
snowflakes?
logcakes?
turkey?
frenz?
lightings?
christmas tree?
whole day in church?
family celebrating togt?
ur love one with u?

When u are younger , a simple logcake/family gathering/cheapo present would suffice
As my age catches on,
all these becomes clearer
something deeper is lacking.

Afterall Christmas is still about Christ..
Being so preoccupied with the planning for event and meeting people these days , I forgot to reflect deeper or choose to ignore taking some SOLID time to really think and give thanks and some action steps to take ( not just physical action but the renewal of some thoughts to surrender, hardest part)

A blog post to u:
Thanks for sending Jesus to be the ultimate expression of love so that we know how to love and care for others.
Thanks for giving us the best gift-salvation for anyone that believes when no one deserve it.
Thanks for forgiving me. You know all the dumbest things i do.
Thanks for ur patience & grace. you know i delayed doing things that i know would have pleased you but becoz of self-interest/pride i did not do what i ought to. Yet u are willing to mould me to be the person you hope i will be.
Thanks for ur wonderful plans for me when i know nuts about it. Your faithfulness & promises.
Thanks for all ur teachings, advices and reminders thru the bible, from others and in prayers.
Thanks for ur company- the Holy Spirit to help us in our weakness and to even intercede for us.
Thanks for every single nitty gritty details /SUPER ULTRA BIG plans that i've overlooked/do not have the wisdom to comprehend.
Thanks for being my strength , my refuge, my listening ear.
Thanks for giving me rest.
Thanks for giving me an identity that I'm proud to be
Thanks for being there all the time.
Thanks for all the blessings u have given.
Thanks for all the people u have placed in my life-every single one.
Thanks for loving me when i'm so unloveable.

Thanks for not just of what you've done but who you actually are.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

So tired i can finally have a good rest:)
retreat!

Off to truly asia...

2010-12-12T20:52:00.002+08:00

Happily tired.
And learnt some lessons here and there, ups and downs
But blessed to have people help me physically and emotional support!

RAR
AWESOME!
Thank God for everything and everyone.
May i not be kan cheong but know u are in control definitely.

Subscribed to Fuda's 'devotion' email from a far far land..
machiam like Paul(Fuda) writing letter(email) to the church(crusaders)so cool experiencing God's miracles and healing on other people from a first-hand encounter.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Like this part:
"When we receive compliments, it’s like receiving a stalk of flower. At the end of the day, after receiving all the thanks and compliments, we would have a whole bunch of flowers to offer to God."

Lastly,
All the best for exams MMMW!!!
FIGHT IT ON! :)

2010-11-25T06:48:00.001+08:00

:(

jiayou
qc

2010-11-01T01:56:00.002+08:00

These few months i must really press on press on press on press on press on press on press on press on press on press on press on press on press on press on press on press on press on press on press on press on press on press on press on press on

Thanks for everything my Heavenly Father every single little thing.

helping me to find a good fyp prof, helpful frens, helping me to learn humility once more,helping me to work with others, helping me to find my iphone , ic which i have lost and get back (not again!) from random people and all, helping me to learn from my fall and all , giving me grace for my mistakes , sending people to encourage and guide me, giving me such a cute nephew, showing me that He can be depend on even when i'm super duper stress now, giving me His Word that encourages , eternal promises He has given, giving me a glimpse of 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001% insight of His creation which He has let me study on (chemistry) and be totally amazed by the uniqueness of creation and the micro details of it that's killing me also haha.

ATOMS MOLECULES DNA BLAH BLAH BLAH ..
It's definitely takes more than a genius to create all THESE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2010-10-19T21:40:00.001+08:00

hai.
hai.
hai.

2010-09-28T07:13:00.002+08:00

Not much time left.. Even my 'stoning' time has to be fast.

2010-09-17T01:03:00.002+08:00

Looking back..it's really not so much of whether if I do or don't do a particular thing or action at that particular point in time, but rather how God helps me to see things in a different perspective that I would never expect

haiyo in conclusion, A poisoned mind sets itself captive.. it's a continuous process and willing effort for mind to be continually renewed by the Holy Spirit
Must nv forget that.

I started off the semester well but
wah if this semester is like a 42.195km marathon, so far I only reached 10km jialat and I'm already out of stamina
Replenish meeee!
Chiong arrrrr! :)

2010-08-30T00:15:00.002+08:00

4 months of holidays passes quickly.
First day of school tmr.. Feels excited like a p1 student:)
I had better be humble man, stop talking and give my undivided attention to the profs
no more ponning of lessons. Learn the hard way.

Masterlife and chemistry notes shall be my best bud for this week!

:)

Alright back to counting sheep.

2010-08-13T12:06:00.002+08:00

Really feel like shit now .. Emo x infinity
I can't even focus during work.
But I got to be strong.. God will help me through this difficult period like He always does.

One day I will look back and thank God again for what He has taught me.

Qc jiayou

2010-08-12T18:24:00.000+08:00

24 hours more till I see rainbowwww!!!
:):):):):)

2010-08-10T21:40:00.002+08:00

Such a bad day...
It's so rare that I can write a consecutive 2 days bad post
tmr will b better....I hope
Pleaaaaasssssseeee

it's not even 10pm and I'm super duper tired
no energy
want to talk to somebody but the whole world is busy as well
ohwells

2010-08-10T00:01:00.002+08:00

Felt quite upset with myself today...
I was bored and lazy...
Very bored but too lazy to do anything
getting out of house is alr a chore
getting out of house and not doing much drains me even more

so I flared up again
hai
sian

tmr will be better I prayed..:x

I hope the customers tmr who called will be kind and the technicians will fix the spoiled items once and for all
I hope the technician has contacted the owner with the spoiled LG fridge and stop calling me. LG really kills me man. Life is not good for the cust and me that's for sure
I hope my Muslim colleagues will stop asking what I'm eating when I'm eating Meepok coz Pork rocks!:)
I hope I can find my sec sch diary's keys, apparently I hid them too well till I myself can't find them
I hope I can persevere what I'm suppose to do , secret for now
I hope I too can be kind to the people around me, I pms too often. I don't want to get beaten up someday

yea I thank God I know God, or rather u know me too well.

2010-07-26T13:57:00.006+08:00

GV 17 Group MTV presentation last part..Poor resolution due to compression
a short 4 mins out of the half an hour we had to present..
lucky it's the special semester.. if not it will be super shiong with so many modules!

love the throw shoe to lift part.. NG so many times but funny nonetheless:)

Venue: NTU, Jurong East MRT platform

and well ....STUDYYYY!!

2010-07-21T22:48:00.004+08:00

NTU will soon become a zoo soon with all the wiring fence it has , just becoz it is the resting ground for Youth Olympics participants. It's either we looked like the caged animals from the inside or ....another way round. Understand the 'security reasons', but it's becoming more inconvenient to walk from place to place nowadays because harder to jay-walk now! erm.. not just jay-walk but i mean MORE of taking short cuts :x

Wah today's presentation was CRAZY but entertaining.
Crazy in a sense i could have lost alot marks but entertaining becoz i
sacrificed to entertain others -.-
demoralized big time during the singing with the anti-climax i make when it's supposed to be a climax as i was suppressing my laughter inside and out of breath becoz of the 'special item' before that
Gek kiang jiu hao... sing jiu sing properly dun do stupid stuff. sigh regrets
wasted!..but i must really say we did have FUN! :)

My class "Ill" Divo
haha they are awesome man!

Withdrawal symptoms hits again, u better come back soon! :(
I've got so much to tell u..

Both my exam papers are next wed.
I've better START studying. my goodness. sian. dun be affected
PRO-crastinator!

:) Jiayou Crunchy

2010-07-21T07:09:00.005+08:00

Been busy these few nights till late.

Did a survey/interview job @ Khatib 8 hours over 2 days and earn quite a bit.
I guess the main gist is the exposure and fun of it.

Got this bachelor and this lady within the same block has similar kind of interests and way of talking. I feel like matchmaking or just tell them they could be potential best friends within the same block! ya many times if the barrier between humans is broken down, you could have make many potential frens with ur neighbours:) Your best fren could be staying just upstairs if u bother talking to them!

One of the elderly residents i interviewed has cancer and she was living alone.
She was so hospitable that she immediately open her house to let me in which I of coz can't. (Reminds me of the verse of letting Christ in when He knocks on the door of ur heart, though i'm not Christ :x) But i had a great time chatting with her and i guess it was also rare for people to knock on her door to chat with her besides from salesmen or insurance agents, with no 'ulterior motives'. Of course i too have a hidden agenda and that is to complete my survey to get my money! haha but i enjoyed the conversation that for a moment of time din really bother to be so task-oriented.

Of course there are some fierce one that just slams door. I even write down in my record of the residents with 'very fierce' and 'very very fierce' comments! lol
I realize the potential of Christ's ministry in whatever marketplace jobs that i held in the future. It further convicts me of some stuffs.
Constants and variables that we learn in secondary school of a math equation for algebra applies similarly in life.
Perhaps maths is not THAT useless after all as it gives u a better concept of what constant (convictions, faith, principles and values) and variables (trials, circumstances and others' reaction) are in a fixed equation (LIFE).
Hmmm... trying to console myself that afterall i din waste my time under MOE for so long as well. :X

Yesterday practiced singing in sch till almost 10pm after my lesson with my group members. Have so much fun, sing-crap , nonsense and serious stuff LOL
Going to have my first solo singing presentation that's graded in a few hours time.
So excited! hope i dun forget the lyrics~~ ^^
Love this module (GV17)
NTU should have more of these!!!

Tour guide who scold tourists for not spending much stuffs as they pay cheap tours , my goodness!!!

2010-07-04T03:08:00.002+08:00

it is by grace you have come so far.
not because u are any better or deserves to.

All has a different destiny to fulfill yet so uniquely important.
The potential of each depends on how willing we are to adhere
, trust, obey and love Him.

As each stage is cleared, the difficulty level seems harder and harder,
but ultimately it is back to the basics again : Seek ye first

2010-06-28T01:15:00.001+08:00

IL DIVO!!

searching, listening to the great passion of love
trying to escape from the future
running away from the past
you and I, always in love
today I have nothing if I don't have you
my heart extinguishes itself
Isabel I'll always love you
Isabel where will you go without me?
I could not live without you (x2)

Flying, falling down on pain
playing, losing empires of illusion
today I have nothing if I don't have you
my heart extinguishes itself
Isabel if you go away
your God will get angry
don't let this love to die this way
I will cry, you will cry
suffering in seclusion
come back to me and
I will make you happy, Isabel

2010-06-19T23:42:00.000+08:00

I found a new hobby and that is to irritate my nephew Aven!!... at least for the time being haha.. He looks really tan after the tanning session, I'm crazy over him now!!! He's so HOT AWWWWWwwwwww....

Sian now only left with FYP.. gotta find a kind-hearted professor to 'adopt' me now.
Really dunno what to do sia..Felt so stranded man.. really need ur guidance my GOD help me!! Please drop a prof from the sky that doesn't just look at GPA before deciding to take me in coz my GPA really CMI. ARGHHHHH...
And christmas programme.. my mind is in a blank now~~.. pray for inspiration
and lastly special semester starts on mon hope i really have the mood to study...
oh aven i miss youuuuuu, u are such a distraction... and u disturb my sleep as well but i know i will miss you when u go home in less than a month's time. Sobz~~

Thanks matt as well for increasing ur tolerance for tandrums. well always remb blame it on pms okayss not my fault arr haha.

Lastly Lord increase my desire in your Word,
really very lazy i know...
wasting my time day by day
doing nothingS as well.

But well u really opened my eyes during the mission trip.
It spoke to me personally that i can't pen it down but i know deep down.
Thanks!
HAPPY FATHERS' DAY to my heavenly and earthly father as well!

Drusilla just sms me to wish me a Happy Fathers' Day
oh wells. -.-
it gotta be 'beatitudes'
haha

2010-06-14T03:07:00.001+08:00

nice lyrics corrinne may's song during the camp :)
one of my fav christian singer!

Sometimes i wonder what lies ahead
How long til my hunger is fed
They say it's hard to make it in this part of town
so many people on this merry-go-round

Some folks try astrology
Some turn to crystal balls
To find an answer
To get through it all
I just fall on my knees and i try to pray
in the silence i can hear Him say

The river runs and the river hides
Out to the ocean and under the sky
I promise you, the answer will come
Hold on to patience and watch for the sign
Everything in its time

I often feel like that i'm two steps behind
Somebody must have moved that finish line
There are a thousand reasons
why i should give up
But i'm stubborn in the things i believe

The river runs and the river hides
Out to the ocean and under the sky
I promise you, the answer will come
Hold on to the patience and watch for the sign

'cause maybe there's another plan
One i still cant see
A little surprise, like your love in your life
Funny how time changes how we see

The river runs and the river hides
Out to the ocean and under the sky
I promise you, the answer will come
Hold on to the patience and watch for the sign
Everything in its time
Everything in its time

2010-06-04T23:00:00.001+08:00

I'm flying off in 9 hours time...
Whether i'm ready or not, the plane is still going to fly.

BABY AVEN!
stop crying...
good boy!

BABY MATTHIAS!!
stop dotaing...
good boy!

haha.
-.-

2010-06-01T01:21:00.001+08:00

2010-05-27T21:48:00.000+08:00

See my results really very sian.
It didn't help that the weather was so hot that it almost melted me.
But thank God for the people u have placed around to remind me of ur grace and mercy to sustain me thus far.

It could have been worse.
Thank God for a God like u.

It was a painful 'pride' lesson for me to learn through these uni years.
It will surely shape and mould me.
But at least i learn abeit a bit later.

a bittersweet smile.

2010-05-24T23:49:00.000+08:00

I like my mission team and we are more bonded now but... sometimes ... the meetings are really.....a bittttt tooooooooooo looooooonnnnggggg :X

But today's meeting was REALLY worth the delay.
Cambodian Missionary Pastor Sharon came and share the culture (quite similar to Thai),history (HORRENDOUS),her experience and most importantly her burdens and prayers for this country. Great to know another faithful and warmth missionary who has a heart for the lost

2010-05-24T23:26:00.001+08:00

Thank God & His people for Supporting Raising!

Namely:
Uncle Larry ( my very first Supporter to pledge in CCR! ^^)
Karen
Yu Qiang
Pauline
Chong How
Jessie
Jeremiah

Contributed to My Pirated Tong Lei Gong:
Uncle Victor
Gary
Charmaine
Aunty Maureen

A total of $1460 was raised :) when i only needed $950 within a week!
the excess was given to my team and 2 other peeps from other mission teams
who were still lacking.
Thanks all who supported mission.
Prayer Newsletter will be done soon :)

2010-05-19T15:41:00.000+08:00

nice

2010-05-15T21:20:00.000+08:00

Today was really a bad day when i woke up.
Felt very grouchy at whatever that comes my way..
I kept complaining in my heart.
Even a seemingly insignificant thing like waiting for the train to arrive
also piss me off when 1 minute feels like forever.
PMS! (when u dunno what is affecting u , just blame it on PMS!)

One thing leads to another.
Complain about 1 thing with that grouchy heart breeding, u will complain about a zillion stuffs.
Even the seminar today about intercession also seems exceedingly long.
At the end there's one feedback survey given to us i also give a less than average rating compared to the other seminars on other days.
SO MEAN hahaa (only today, i'm usually kind)
Then suddenly i realized my mind is really poisoned.

SCARY.
it's scary when u witness YOUR OWN worst side.
Because we are so used to witnessing other people's worst side.
Complacency creeps in when we think we wouldn't be like them

Repented immediately man when the worship song came.
then the worship leader say focus on Jesus.
It came so apt at that time.
Think my mind was preoccupied with lots of stuff.
Then i closed my eyes with the worship song playing,
and Jesus as the MTV male lead going around preaching and administering to others, and the cruxifixion.
Wah that image is powerful.
Those poisons in my heart was removed like instantly.

Jesus my MTV male lead
Thanks
:)

2010-05-10T11:50:00.000+08:00

After so many changes the mission trip destination will be Cambodia.
To say the truth felt a bit sian when u hear news of people dropping out of team due to many changes in the trip to Thailand when it was called off.
Coz i was also tempted to make my own plans already.
Don't feel like gg as well .. now is to pray for a heart ready to go like the reason why i wanted to go in the first place.

Saw sixiao my pri sch friend yesterday at Pasir Ris interchange.
so i catch up quickly with her.
She's born in HK, currently staying in singapore alone as her family is in HK
She's intending to go back to HK after her degree in NUS.

Sounds familiar the family background.
ESTHER CHENG
Then i told her i got a fren in a situation like hers as well.
Turn out they know each other as they are in the same DG in Campus Crusade.
What a small world after all.

Yesterday i asked matt to bring me to witness the 'beauty' of DOTA in lan shop.
Seriously it's just
hideous monsters as avatar with horror-movie background music!!...

argghhh.

2010-05-05T11:54:00.000+08:00

Relationship dialectics

1) Autonomy/connection- desires to be separate , on the one hand and to be connected, on the other, opposition of which creates tension. Because we want to be deeply linked to others, we cherish spending time with our intimates, sharing experiences and feeling connected. At the same time , each of us needs an independent identity. We don't want relationships to swallow our individuality, so we seek distance, even from our intimates.

2) Novelty/predictability-opposition of the desire for familiar routines and desire for novelty. We like a certain amount of routine to provide security and predictability in
our lives. Yet too much routine is boring so we seek novel experience to introduce variety in customary routine.

3) Openness/closeness-desires for openness in tension with the desire for privacy. While being open and honest is desired, complete openness would be intolerable.

--Communication Mosaics

Exam's over :)
My starhub channels are waiting..Time to catch my 下一站，幸福 dramas!
Catch up with peeps sooooonnnn
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

"First of all, you must understand that in the last days, scoffers will come, scoffing and following their evil desires. They will say, "where is this 'coming' he promised? ..." -2 peter 3:3-4

"But do not forget this one thing, dear friends : with the Lord a day is like a thousand years , and a thousand years are like a day. The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise , as some understands slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish , but everyone to come to repentance"
- 2 Peter 3:8

"Bear in mind that our Lord's patience means salvation, just as our dear brother Paul also wrote you with the wisdom that God gave him...
- 2 Peter 3:15

Therefore dear friends , since u already know this , be on your guard,so that you will not be carried away by the error of lawless men, and fall from your secure position. But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. To him be glory both now and forever . Amen.
-2 Peter 3:17-18

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I come before you today
And there's just one thing that I want to say
Thank you Lord,Thank you Lord

For all you've given to me
For all the blessings I can not see
Thank you Lord,Thank you Lord

With a greatful heart, with a song of praise
with an outstreched arm, I will bless your name

Thank you Lord,I just want to thank you Lord
Thank you Lord,I just want to thank you Lord
Thank you Lord

For all you've done in my life
You took my darkness and gave me your light
Thank you Lord,Thank you Lord

You took my sin and my shame,
You took my sickness and healed all my pain
Thank you Lord,Thank you Lord

With a greatful heart, with a song of praise
with an outstreched arm, I will bless your name

Thank you Lord,I just want to thank you Lord
Thank you Lord,I just want to thank you Lord
Thank you Lord ( x infinity)

2010-05-03T18:55:00.000+08:00

Not superstitious or what but...
All the best for my last paper tmr!

2010-04-30T01:25:00.000+08:00

unprecedented stress.
i can't take it.
save me.

2010-04-24T00:10:00.000+08:00

TOTALLY AGREE!
LOL

2010-04-23T23:47:00.001+08:00

The Conclusion of the Matter (STUDY WEEK)

Quoting from a fellow mission-tripper who quoted from Ecclesiastes 12:12b ( the book that i always cannot pronounce!),

"Of making many books there is no end, and much study wearies the body..."

sorry it was out of context but i had to agree in reference to the way i spend this week.

i just wanna say "Meaningless! Meaningless!"...haha...

Overheard this conversation:

"boy u must study hard get good results.. get into a good school, if not ur future will be ruined and u will regret"... and i turn to look at him, my gosh he's so young think not even in primary school yet.. :x

the reason why muggers grow at an exponential rate occupying all the seats EVERYWHERE.

SADLY, with me contributing as well haha.
s1an

2010-04-17T01:40:00.000+08:00

Psalm 19:12-14
"Who can discern his errors?
Forgive my hidden faults.
Keep yr servant also from willful sins;
may they not rule over me.
Then will I be blameless , innocent of great
transgression.
May the words of my mouth and the mediation of my heart
be pleasing in yr sight,
O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer."

Sorry
My Abba Father

2010-04-13T00:59:00.000+08:00

It suddenly became a christian and non-christian fight...
when my grandpa is suffering from a stroke, lying on the deathbed
The tactless comments make by the christian uncle and several taoism,buddhist aunties make things worse.
I can't even bear the scene.

At least it even affect my cousins to suan my uncle @ FB

When anger is blinding you, it's useless to reason out i figure.
What's more important is i know my granddad accepted christ , he will be 100% saved.

Leave the feud to the previous generation.
I dun side with anyone, i dun agree with the approach.

The heart is deceitful , all in the name of filial piety.

2010-04-12T21:31:00.000+08:00

Thailand is seriously chaotic got a bad feeling. :(
Revival Thailand!

I bet everyone played broken telephone before ; when 1 message is passed down through N number of people before it reaches you. The message usually is distorted despite the time duration being so short (supposedly retention of the message would be better compared to the message conveyed over several weeks or even months)

Broken Telephone is a super good illustration that humans generally are not very good messengers ( selective listening? biasness? personal judgement involved? poor memory? unable to capture fully the complexity of the message? distort to suits one preference?)

In real life, BROKEN TELEPHONES are everywhere.
somehow all of us played a role in it as well whether we know it or not.
The result can be unimaginable.
It just remind me to exercise discernment when hearing NOT from a first party account.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Saw Samuel,my p6 tutee playing iphone
Gab: wah, samuel u got iphone ar?
ME: no la mine
Gab: WAAAAAHHHHHH, u got iphone ar?
that's even more shocking.

the -.-" part is the second WAHHHHH is not sarcasm, i could hear it was a geniune WAHHHHH.

DIAO~~

...

2010-04-07T21:26:00.000+08:00

MUG!! MUG!! MUG!!...

social skills have come to an all new low.
face notes all day long, was so stressed until i can wake up thinking if i hv time to finish what i'm supposed to study.
Slower reaction time to react to matt's jokes and talk and move around...
and detect a wall??... yes a wall.

I was sms-ing and i din notice this wall was in front of me.
And i banged my head against it.
A BALUKU immediately surfaced. SUPER PAINFUL
Super pai seh because got 1 gal witness the whole scene.
She was trying hard not to laugh.. she really tried her best not to laugh..
and i wanted to laugh at her becoz she was trying hard to suppress her laughter.
2 Laughing Jokers laughing at each other.

but the baluku was so painful that i can't even laugh
I just diao her.
ouchhhh.
BALUKU i hate u.

2010-04-04T01:07:00.001+08:00

Today met up with the mission-trip team to Pattaya!
Felt really excited as it's the first time seeing them.
Think we shld be able to clique quite well coz most of them are crazy and easy-going kind from NUS.

I was late from tuition and left only photography and scriber role to choose??
I took photography as i'm not meticulous with writing down stuff for every single significant thing that happen in the trip.
But i seriously hope the pics will not turn out just me zi-pai(ing) myself the whole trip!
haha so tempting..oh well

Yesterday was Good Friday..
Watched the clip again on the crucifixion of Christ.
Can't help but teared madly again though it was just a movie and really really really hard to imagine it was real when u watched so many similar movies with so many special effects and u know they are fake.
The focus was the redemption that took place 2000+ years back
IT WAS REAL ... the humiliation , pain , sacrifice , and the grace and mercy and LOVE.

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."

One and only Son
I always thought if i REALLY know the significance of that, will i still be living the way i live?

Looking for...
temporary spiritual highs?
head knowledge of the bible?
endless servings?
Fun christian friends?
Comfort,comfort and comfort only from Holy Spirit when u are sad?

or a real desire to know Him and be transformed..:)

2010-03-28T01:34:00.000+08:00

I wonder is it just me..
but i can 'tag' a particular song unto each and every single
person that are close to me.

So when i hear a song, it's definitely more than a song ...
..but with memories!

2010-03-28T01:07:00.001+08:00

today anastacia asked me : crunchy so how was ur chemistry test?
I was like hmmmmm... ( the usual cui and CMI sigh) but i was like surprised she even remb. Coz i shld be the one asking her how's her test.

anastacia : so can pass anot?
i juz smiled back.

Somehow sensing how i felt , samuel said : Nvm la... at least no matter what u will still have ur uni cert. I got more to worry.. haven't get my PSLE cert yet.

HAHAHAHAA!
stunned, then i just request to pray together with them since we are trapped in this same mad-non-stop-mugging-vicious-i-dun-know-what-am-i-studying cycle

totally like bring me to a whole new perspective.
I totally love this two Pri 6 frens from T2C!
Though u all are really irritating and crappy MOST of the time , u do talk sense OCCASIONALLY!
and i just wanna say i really appreciate and love to meet u all though i have to sacrifice 2 hours of my sleep on every lazy saturday morning.. ~~yawn
hahah muacksss

kids are kids if u treat them as kids.
they are more mature than u perceive.

2010-03-25T13:28:00.000+08:00

muffin has been staying over at my house for 1 week.

isit just muffin or do all dogs lick non-stop??
My goodness... it licks NON-STOP and i really meant non-stop and follow me all around till i nearly tripped over her many times.
scaryy..although i've many complaints but think i will still miss her when she's back to her owner.. sad:(

Yesterday was crazy.. never bring key and HANDPHONE when u know u are meeting some people in the later part of the day ! and u cannot remb all their numbers.
almost died.. i guess it is when this kind of situation occurs, then u will start to be innovative and think of ways. It always happen haha. maybe that's how creativity and adaptability came about for me?!
sianz

Having lab now..
Super hungry like crazy.. especially after u smell so much chemicals in the lab. Think i really enjoyed labwork boiling chemicals and stuff, <3 eveything except for the lab report part.
waiting for popo to finish hers before we go for lunch,
yep and meeting matttt after that :)

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2010-03-22T01:49:00.000+08:00

Thanks for ur assurance & encouragements.
It really motivates me ALOT
Know i shldn't just depend on a human for all that.
though... it's super addictive :))))))
andddd... "happily ever after" only happens in fairy tale
gals are indeed more emotional
adjusting of expectations are indeed important from time to time

A reminder for me to constantly go back to the main source
running in the right direction.

hope u too:)
--------------------------------------------------------------
argh busy!
Chemistry kills

2010-03-09T19:56:00.000+08:00

2010-03-01T21:42:00.000+08:00

As i sang that worship song one year back,
it was from a heart of desperation and a need to seek comfort from God.
But the same song was sang yesterday...
and it became a song of heartfelt thanksgiving and worship for the faithful God who see me through all that has passed...

The road ahead is definitely not a bed of roses.
I may encounter the same situation/problems again
But u are the same Lord yesterday, today and tomorrow
giving me the confidence that u can see me through anything that comes ^v^...

closure
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Recess week Day 1

today's great making crepes @ est's house in faraway Woodlands
but they din turned out crunchy. :(
Hope the rest of the peeps will eat them though

Est's sis look TOTALLY like Est!
another pair of siblings that look so alike
scary!!

and the day passes superrr fast!
Alright gotta pick up the notes now and chiong!
boring & random post
good nite world!

2010-02-21T00:57:00.000+08:00

Eileen thanks for it... You've been 'pestering' me to go for Gen12ii for the past month until i'm sooooo irritated. AND i strongly rejected with many many reasons which i believe are genuine reasons.....i still do even now la.. i will still do my special semester but i can't go summer research.. will my lab-work become more chui??
But i know deep down i really dun wanna do labwork :( not even in the near future!!!
Now i know where u are coming from... eileen
i just prayed about it and look thru the schedule again... ( very longgg in fact)

I decided at 1AM Sunday where deadline is just less than 24 hours away
I'm going to THAILAND for gen12ii
but i'm not going 1 month la.. just 10 days :)

Thailand Southern Cross-
where our focus will be the 75,000 chinese tourists in Thailand.
Share the gospel in creative ways in thailand! (in chinese??)
COOL .. i'm sooooo excited...

Now the next task : support raising $$$
My fearful part...
But God provides :)

2010-02-21T00:05:00.000+08:00

Gen12ii?? (1 mth)
Summer research ?? (2.5mths)
Special sem ?? (7 weeks)

howhowhow... shld i????

2010-02-15T22:27:00.000+08:00

Alright CNY is really BORRRINGGG!
but it's not becoz I'm getting older.

This was how i spent today:
I laid on bed for almost the whole afternoon,
groaning in pain, while the family is out.
:'(

If every month is gg to be this painful,
i'm gg to die!

my cousin used to say "aiya gals only need to endure the pains & discomfort of pregnancy~give u max 9 mths but guys go for suffering in army for approx~ 2yrs"

my goodness, where got people compare like that one??!
If i have 3 kids then i suffered >2yrs rite..and more years to come with crazy kids
ok that's lousy i'm not gg to counter with that

the point is , it's really painful ( at least for me , YESSSHH! )

2010-02-13T21:44:00.000+08:00

It's a boy!
my beloved nephew :)

actually my bro-in-law is not that 'dao' after all.
HE CAN JOKE, COOL!!

hahaha...
sometimes ur perspective of someone does change,
and that's becoz u may not know that person well enough
or that person is simply just not comfortable to be himself/herself in front of you previously

i super envy those people who can be themselves anytime, anywhere.
( of coz in formal occasions, that's another thing la, i mean generally)
They have this aura around them to influence others :
You don't felt any awkwardness and u can just let down ur defenses and be yourself with them feeling comfortable as well even if u just met for the first time.

anyway, i really <3 reunion dinner.
HAPPY CNY 2010!

though alot ppl say it's boring, let's not get influence by them!
these are just signs they are getting older
haha..

2010-02-10T00:25:00.000+08:00

eileen mentioned this during DG:

Jesus said "... the truth will set u free" in John 8:32.
Similarly the converse remains true as well.

"Deceptions will keep you in bondage"

--------------------------------------------------------------------------
The bondage of being trapped in a situation, thinking that u can never get out of it. Fears of unknown future, deception that God is far away...the list goes on
anything that's untrue of God's character and promises mentioned in the bible can flash thru our minds easily at times when we're feeling really low/let our guard down spiritually. We cannot entertain those thoughts at all- resist playing with fire!

"Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings"

1 Peter 5:8-9

2010-02-04T22:48:00.000+08:00

Hangman - Clue : An expression

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _!!!!!!!!

ANSWER : STRESS STRESS STRESS!!!!!!!!

HELP!

2010-01-26T19:58:00.000+08:00

" My grievance with contemporary society is with its decreptitude. There are few towering pleasures to allure me, no beauty to bewitch me, nothing erotic to arouse me, no intellectual circles or positions to challenge or provoke me, no burgeoning philosophies or theologies and no new art to catch my attention or engage my mind, no arousing political, social or religious movements to stimulate or excite me. There are no free man to lead me. No saints to inspire me. No sinners sinful enough to either impress me or share my plight. No one human enough to validate the "going" lifestyle. It's hard to linger in that dull world without being dulled.
I stake the future on the few humble and hearty lovers who seek God passionately in the marvelous, messy world of redeemed and related realities that lie in front of our noses. " -William McNamara
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

bored? dull? sian?

Everyone of us needs to be stretched to live at our best, awakened out of dull moral habits, shaken out of petty and trivial busy-work.
Easier to be parasite, easier to relax in the embracing arms of the average. Easier but not better. Easier but not more significant. Easier, but not more fulfilling.
i think i need Spirit of Excellence like seriously but not equivalent to the perfectionist's kind of excellence. Difference b/w the two lies in the motive and reaction when perfection result is not achieved i guess

2010-01-20T23:21:00.000+08:00

Acts 9:18
Suddenly something like fish scales fell from Saul's eyes, and he could see again.

Suddenly something like wool was removed from qc's eyes, and she could see again.

the unexplainable joy

iknowGodknow
butigottaPresson

2010-01-13T23:04:00.000+08:00

It's like u suddenly discovered the blanket is full of holes and you can no longer hide but have to come out of it and say HI!

God is super good in making me face up to my fears ,
so hai dun even think of SIAM-ing!

Face up to it . be brave. put down any pride. smile

Psalms:
"O LORD, you have searched me
and you know me.

2 You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.

3 You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.

4 Before a word is on my tongue
you know it completely, O LORD. ...

7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?

8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, [a] you are there.

9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,

10 even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.

23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.

24 See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear, too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice, but for those who love, time is eternity.” -Henry Van Dyke

2010-01-05T23:08:00.000+08:00

I'm after all human
Withdrawal symptoms hits again.
Maybe this is what they called quarter-life crisis.

Just a FULL day at home can drive me nuts.
Acer is officially down, like finally
sighh

I need my dose of lame-ness & laughter
shall chiong my taiwanese drama: 海派甜心! :)

2009-12-31T14:39:00.000+08:00

Back from metamorphosis camp,

One thing that struck me greatly was the Street Evangelism. I always limit Street E to just Street E, well i think God really help me to fine-tune that and opened up my eyes.

We were having street E.
Est and i were walking to this ulu void deck in commonwealth when we saw this 50 plus woman sitting alone. We went to approach her and intro ourselves. This woman knowing our intention to evangelise told us she's already a christian. But we still chatted a little while and find out some stuff,

She don't stay in commonwealth,in fact she took a bus having a large detour to this place which she never come before and sit at this void deck to 'stone', like a retreat away from home.
She shared that she has to take care of her sick husband at home, which she feel weary.
She is always the one who show concern for other people around but people don't really ask about her. She said that she prayed that there will be people to encourage her becoz she feels like giving up but at the same time she can't coz she knows her family members (all prebelievers) will see her as a testimony of her faith so she has to persevere.

We prayed for her and she keep thanking us repeatedly, and i really think even though what we could do was limited, just a short prayer and a listening ear to her ramble of all her frustration and weariness. But can see she really have heartfelt thanks for God at that time when she was feeling low by sending people to encourage her and that answer her prayers, when actually est and me really anyhow walk without any destination in point then spotted her.
The next day she text me and est, thanking us and calling us angels whom passed by.
I also thank God for bringing her to us.

I'm usually skeptical when people readily receive christ. But sometimes the harvest may really just be ready for u to go one step further to assist them to declare their faith as the seeds were sown long time and it's just time for harvest. Two Ah ma were sitting at the void deck, both of them said they aren't christians but their kids are and they brought them to church. They also know jesus is good and stuff but they have their own gods. But when est ask them if they wanna receive Christ, they weren't resistent to it at all. One ah ma commented, "but i dunno how to receive christ, i dunno how to read or say angmoh'. then we go thru the sinners' prayer with them the chinese version and they repeated after us.

They keep thanking us again after that and i ask one ah ma to tell her son she alr accepted christ,go church and don't worship any more other gods already because there's only one real God- Jesus Christ. She nod her head and thank us again.

Before this two ah mas , we have approached 3 ah mas and 1 ah gong who said their kids were also christians but they strongly refused to be christians due to their own gods they have been worshipping for XX years and was furious when we want to tell them about jesus.

My skepticism really decreases ALOT when i met the last 2 ah mas who accepted christ so readily.

Then we met one guy who was on his way home.. who was a christian when he was a teen but backslided when he was sentenced to 10-years imprisonment as he took drugs.He was bitter, jobless, divorced, and even his own son applied for Protection Order so that he cannot come near them when he went to visit his son. He ask us if God really loves him, where is He when he needed Him..
My heart really sink, sank sunk when someone so hurt keep questioning if God really loves him...
U can't outwin him in debates so the best way to end it off is prayer.
Surprisingly, he readily wanted the prayer.
Like despite of so much accuses he had for God, deeply inside u can feel he still desperately wanted to go back to God again.
Dunno how is he now and i doubt i will ever see him again, as he doesn't even have a phone but pray that the lord will continue to speak to him as he opens up his heart for healing to take place.

There's always this thought when u go out for street E: when u have to choose and eliminate people to speak to (evanglise) due to limited time constraint. Deep down, I know if I can I will gladly just use a loudhailer to proclaim the good news to EVERYONE, but of course it doesn't work this way and will definitely backfire.Street E doesn't stop here, it continues even when i'm 'off-duty'

If priority is not wrong i guess this will remind me,
We are christians working undercover as students not students who happen to be christians.

2009 is going to be over. It was a tough year i must say.
But i'm really thankful for God and His people who are great encouragers & challengers.

Psalm 40:5 Many, O LORD my God,
are the wonders you have done.
The things you planned for us
no one can recount to you;
were I to speak and tell of them,
they would be too many to declare.

sidetrack a bit results are out,
phew thank God..LEVEL CLEARED! :)

Happy 2010!
-------------------------------------------------
Janice and her partner durning street E...

Jan's partner: what new year resolution do you have for 2010?
Thin Guy: slim down
Jan's partner: huh why? but u are already very slim
Thin Guy look up and down at jan's partner: well different people different expectations.

2009-12-28T13:00:00.000+08:00

If u really care for the person and want to know his/her secret, not simply for kaypo's sake.
I guess even right now the secret should be well-guarded and not spreading around.
Not refering to those secrets like 'i just murdered somebody' or 'i took drugs dunno what to do now' which definitely needs immediate attention.
But those seemingly trivial stuff u know can have a negative impact which doesn't eddify when spread around w/o the person's consent simply all in the name of fun.
If one can't even keep others' secret, what's this thing about self-control or even trust

PUI..

2009-12-25T01:47:00.000+08:00

merry christmas.
got so much things to update, dunno where to start from but yep i'm back from youth camp and khon kaen!

great people great food great reminders great encounters great love experienced
from simple events and things.

Some quotes/reminders here & there..
"we are little but we have great visions for the people here"--Aunty WK
"don't ask how we can gain access to the prisons,rehab,slums... God opens the way"
--Aunty WK
"don't pray that programs will run smoothly but rather our faith will be strengthen through all these"--Jere & Zing
"be ready for unexpected situations. what if pauline or jeremiah is not here..." --Jun
"God isn't for efficiency like how singaporeans pride themselves on but efficacy"--Jere
"they are just like normal kids who yearn for love" --Aussie refering to the HIV-positive kids
"I will be obedient to God"-- written by Evan the missionary at the back of his bible in his secondary school days

poor memory.. cannot remember exactly what they said but roughly the gist is there. I probably forgotten alot more which i wanted to add in as precious reminders i want to hold on to...

Not to forget those images..

-the airplane view of agriculture fields (size of legos) which reminds me of God's faithfulness & his love for so many people from other ends of the earth which i do not know of and reminds me of Pastor Glen's sermon of the macro-ness of his creation and micro-ness of us.
-slums which i didn't realize are slums. i seriously thought they are just shelters
-the little gal from slum who hold on to the NERDS sweet which i pour out in her dirty palm tightly,eating only one at a time,savouring it slowly.
-the beautiful & big field with cow dung embedded here and there(the harvest are plenty but the workers are few)
-the australian who give the HIV positive kid a great big nice HUG, one of the warmest hug i've seen (not the patronising kind)
-those rough, uncouth and tatooed prisoners who stood up to receive Christ readily
-thais youth christians praying for us which sounds like tongue. Don't understand them but could clearly felt the Holy Spirit as they prayed as we serve the same God
-those smiles, sawadee :)

i can forget anything but not God's faithfulness!

2009-12-09T23:02:00.000+08:00

The inability to communicate your thoughts (my thoughts are messy like the icons on my laptop desktop!) can really be frustrating at times when
people dunno what u are talking about and who can u blame but yourself.

Thankfully at the end of the day, when u are just all alone.
Prayer to God is so at ease because every word can just come right from the bottom of your heart. No prayer template is needed in order to achieve 'effective communication' with God. It doesn't matter at this moment whether my problems are solved anot or still in the pending process. But i know right at this moment just to dwell in His presence is all that's enough.

No worries about sentence structure, grammatical errors or how shallow my worries and thoughts are, just the thought of it is *phew~ enough. :)

YOUTH CAMP TMR..;)
may the good Lord bless each and every single camper.
Good rest everyone!

2009-12-05T21:56:00.000+08:00

A Life Revealed--National geographic
Her eyes have captivated the world since she appeared on our cover in 1985. Now we can tell her story.
By Cathy Newman
Photograph by Steve McCurry

Totally besotted with her eyes man.
make me that pair of contact lens!!...

ok that's not the point.

["Time and hardship have erased her youth. Her skin looks like leather. The geometry of her jaw has softened. The eyes still glare; that has not softened. "She's had a hard life," said McCurry.So many here share her story." Consider the numbers. Twenty-three years of war, 1.5 million killed, 3.5 million refugees: This is the story of Afghanistan in the past quarter century.

Now, consider this photograph of a young girl with sea green eyes. Her eyes challenge ours. Most of all, they disturb. We cannot turn away.

... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...

Such knife-thin odds. That she would be alive. That she could be found. That she could endure such loss. Surely, in the face of such bitterness the spirit could atrophy. How, she was asked, had she survived?

The answer came wrapped in unshakable certitude.

"It was," said Sharbat Gula, "the will of God." ]

what's unshakable certitude?
i dunno which God she refering to and most prob not the one that i know of.
But well, think we are TOO BLESSED to just imagine others' hardship when we are so absorbed in ours. Give me their kind of hardship now, i will just breakdown immediately.
But i too want that kind of unshakable certitude when people ask of the God that i know of, not dependent on situations... it's hard but definitely not impossible with that God of ours we know of.

2009-12-03T02:14:00.000+08:00

A random post probably due to me having an exam like really soon and i'm still not sleeping..and i'm not exactly mugging coz my laptop is in front!

today i saw many 'safari-themed' clothes after mugging.
quite sensitive to all the stripes and animal printed apparels.
It just reminds me of THANKSGIVING THANKSGIVING THANKSGIVING!
jan still ask me dress up as a zoo-keeper when i told her the theme, but i still dun quite get it.. what's the link between zoo-keeper & safari?
Then i realize ya there's a link if it's NIGHT SAFARI!

bonitochico didn't send me any mail, i was just a few minutes late and my platform shoes are gone!..& backorders will be too late
but how to rush when u are buying stuff online?
but still better than choosing module in NTU.. u really need to 'F5' non-stop
and the system will hang.

And i hate chemistry but i got to love it man.
Be of good stewards of whatever i'm given and i got no reason to complain-
Well i CHOOSE it three years back.

my last paper will be on friday morning.. my fren was still happily talking abt the plans after exams but i just.... Guess mission trip still left alot stuff undone, actually should be ALOT stuff not done yet. just the thought of it seems overwhelming because DEAD-line is just SO near and youth camp is just next week.

But think will enjoy planning with the mission team anyway since all of them i'm quite comfortable with and they are so funny. So no worries and ask for Lord's guidance.

things left undone that requires IMMEDIATE action this dec:

1)cut & dye hair
2)change phone, anything just to replace that army phone i'm having now
3)mission plan draft 2 for aunty wai kheng to see
4)clean up my room
5)watch my recorded shows in smartTV left rotting for eons
6)prepare cell word for this sun
7)movies,shopping,on-line dramas,buffets,exercise (weird to place buffet&exercise side by side but wells...)
8)meet-ups & stayovers!(ma-mui is back!)

Well 3am now le! i got a paper @ 9am.
I'm like dead tired and HYPER now! .. can like jog around 10 rounds NTU
ya in my dreams
Alright God Bless little miss eye-bag!

PS: i gotta adjust the time shown in blog, it's just not accurate ..

2009-12-02T02:26:00.000+08:00

when i say this taiwanese singer is worth my attention,
i am like really assured i don't judge someone by his/her look!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"I believe in the sun even when it's not shining
I believe in love where feeling is not.
I believe in God even if he is silent."

-Inscription on the walls of a cellar in Cologne, Germany,
where Jews hid from the Nazis

2009-11-30T22:56:00.000+08:00

this doesn't seems like a joke
-.-"

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

????????????????????????????

result from google autocomplete

LOL

2009-11-26T23:47:00.000+08:00

anti-MJC sidegate turnstille production: the scripting is creativeee lar ... lol

2009-11-25T20:20:00.000+08:00

and again and again and again and again and again and again and again...

ARGGGHHHHH!!!
scary!!

2009-11-25T19:21:00.000+08:00

chanced upon this article, a timely reminder about motives again:
http://www.rbc.org/bible-study/been-thinking-about/2008/04/01/column.aspx

Motives and faith

Jesus talked a lot about motives. His approach, however, was to help us focus on our own hearts before going after the faults of others. Because of our inclination to do the right things for the wrong reasons, He told His disciples not to let their left hand know when their right hand was giving to the poor (Matthew 6:3-4). He also said that when they prayed they should do so in secret rather than making a self-serving public display of their spirituality (vv.6, 18).

If we are not careful, we can do some of the best things for the worst reasons. Our purposes combine with what we believe and do to shape the character of our faith, our love, and our laughter. They fuel blind ambition and feed bitter envy. They determine whether we use the knowledge of the Bible to help others, or to control, condemn, and con them out of their money.

Bad motives can put honorable actions to shame just as good motives can turn even the most menial task into something noble.....
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Jeremiah 17:9-10

The heart is deceitful above all things
and beyond cure.
Who can understand it?
I the LORD search the heart
and examine the mind,
to reward a man according to his conduct,
according to what his deeds deserve.

2009-11-24T22:39:00.000+08:00

Dwight: Jim is my enemy. But it turns out Jim is also his own worst enemy. And the enemy of my enemy is my friend. So Jim is actually my friend.

-.-"

2009-11-22T21:45:00.000+08:00

A RAT just 'jogged' over my laptop adaptor cable @ superdog...
howhowhow
i know it's bimbotic but should i disinfect the wires??

GROSS!

2009-11-21T00:34:00.000+08:00

"XXX says:
u know what
i have been wanting to say this
i know you mean well
i know u really hope that im well too
i didnt tried to restrain it if u thought i had.
but there's also a reason why i did not become a christian.
crunch- says:
?
XXX says:
simply, i don't agree to all the stuffs that i read and even after reading the link that u gave just now too.ya and i hope being honest wont change things.
but i must say this after u really go church often.. u become a happier person. and i'm glad for what u have become too
crunch- says:
yep i definitely hope the same for you too and sorry for not being a fren that's always by ur side and i meant that too really "

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

i meant that REALLY coz i've known u for 7 years and really wish the best for u.
God bless u

2009-11-18T22:40:00.003+08:00

Ever been in situations 'not here not there'?

like the fish bone stuck in your throat,
neither can u swallow down nor spit it out.
It just got stuck, stuuckk, stuuucccckk.

like u waited for an EMPTY bus @ NTU freaking long.
And A FEW buses just freakingly pass by with HORDES of people
and u walk halfway to the bus stop in front of that u were waiting
an empty bus comes by. You can't run in time in front or behind
u can only look at it.. passing by.
-------------------------------------

Whatever and whatsoever 'not here not there' situations encountered,nobody would wanna stay at that uncomfortable position for long i suppose.
i guess most importantly,
don't be a 'not here not there'-lukewarm christian
Keep the fire burning!
"I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth." Rev 3 :15-16

there goes my 'not here not there' random-to-the-max thoughts..

2009-11-13T13:43:00.000+08:00

Wah really had a fruitful time studying
with BROTHER zing!(hahaha).
I managed to finish 2 chap without sleeping.. incredible FEAT!
I must continue with this pace man just to finish my revision.
Wahh really really really hard ...
i'm sure there's definitely an efficient and interesting way of studying that
can swiftly cut down on the time taken and the content revised really be locked in my memory. But i know that method will be too mind-stimulating dun think i wanna adopt. My battery life will be use up very fast.
So for now i will just stubbornly stick to that OLD method of rewriting notes for many hours without being sure of if the content is stuck in my mind.It just seems safer and stable, i mean after all i've been using that method for XX years...maybe only med chem cannot use that method,getting back a single digit result really humbles me like giving me 10 tight slaps on my cheeks. Tsk!...who says SU alr no need study... sianz!

First time i'm like really really really HAPPY to be called an auntie.
My sister is 2 months pregnant!!!
Awwwwww...but nobody in my family is like excited as me.
My dad is so excited that that he just 'orh' then sleep back after hearing the news.
-.-"... i hope he's just REALLY tired.

time flies.. really like nobody's business.
i'm still clueless abt many stuffs in life.
In the process of searching and giving back i guess.
God bless me.

2009-11-06T18:43:00.000+08:00

I think i've grown up alr.

All thanks to God..
Guess alot of stuff doesn't affect me that much le.

Even if the circumstance is to become as bad as what i have thought to be.
I think i am READY to embrace it, for what's to come.

talk abt breakthrough man
tsk!

my Lord u are with me rite, always and forever?

based on what i've read in bible, He will reply enthusiastically like Jessie: YESSSSHH!

2009-11-04T01:15:00.001+08:00

Oh lord ...
if every semester is like a crazy rat race,
then i will be wasting so much time and youth(gals age so much faster when stressed!)and missing
a whole LOT picture in this phase of my life.

but surprisingly i did see improvement in coping,
the controlling of my emotions and even the ever-increasing level of my 'threshold limit' (though i seriously dread that.. argghh).
guess that's character shaping aka pruning ar..,

AND all these are not possible without the LORD and all these are for a common good purpose!
I know i know...

my english sucks but let me 'rejoice while i'm suffering' for i shall see the light soon! yeaaahhh...

Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
-lamentations 3:22-23

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
according to edmund and ann chan,
there are 15 spiritual disiplines:
1) Solitude
2) Prayer
3) Fasting
4) Quiet mediation
5) Silence
6) Praise
7) Chastity
8) Confession
9) Obedience
10) Journalling
11) Scripture Memorizing
12) Scripture
13) Sharing Christ
14) Service
15) Sacrifice

Not saying the rest are easy, but among all journaling seems to be really hard.
Unless u count E-journal aka this shallow blog as journaling? lol.
But the most challenging disiplines are still quiet meditation and silence.
yah really tough if u are the talk/think randomly non-stop kind of person... well hence the reason why they are called disciplines coz it juz doesn't come NATURALLY..

but spiritual disciplines are sooooo impt, they formed the foundation for us to recognise the way out that God has provided us to stand up under it since
temptations to sin come naturally like gravitational pull.

"So if u think u are standing firm, be careful that u don't fall. No temptations has seized u except what is common to man. And God is faithful, He will not let u be tempted beyond what u can bear. But when u are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that u can stand up under it." 1 cor 10:12-13

2009-11-02T13:33:00.000+08:00

Like this pic mannn... look like it's my birthday!
...i looked HIGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
hahaaa
It was YY's 21st birthday... she was like soooooo sexaeeeee with the bareback and salsa dance.

and I'm spastic.. all thanks to shi hui.
really feel like strangling her at times!

and i'm so GLAD I 'SU' medicinal chem...
best choice

2009-11-02T01:04:00.000+08:00

Love is sometimes crazily blind.

I told jessie if one day i turn blind,
i ask her to splash water on me, scold me
and if need be just go ahead and bite me..

She typed back 'YESSS!!!'

...(0.0")

i can't help but feel the enthusiasm in her.

haha

2009-10-29T14:11:00.000+08:00

Just now
i lost my thumbdrive, not having hope i will find it again in NTU (since everybody loves free gift just look at the loooonnggg queue for goodie bags and u will know) but somebody saw and return to me.
thank God u are so nice

1 hour plus later, another person called me and said he found
my ezlink card. Great relief since my card has concession pass.
thank God u are really nice

i really dun deserve it since i keep losing stuffs..
and getting it back again.
i shld really just.. bang the wall

2009-10-29T00:20:00.000+08:00

...have i reach my threshold?

2009-10-21T23:29:00.000+08:00

2009 PSLE Maths Question

Jim bought some chocolates and gave half of it to Ken. Ken bought some sweets and gave half of it to Jim. Jim ate 12 sweets and Ken ate 18 chocolates. The ratio of Jim's sweets to chocolates became 1 : 7 and the ratio of Ken's sweets to chocolates became 1:4. How many sweets did Ken buy?. Ans: 68 sweets (5marks)

Jan challenged me to this.
Took ehem.. quite a super duper long time to solve with model drawing.
If i had this question during my PSLE, i will definitely skip this and be contented with just having 95/100 for maths.
Why make life so difficult for P6?
hai..i can only say i really pity the generations to come, the rat race will be crazier and crazier and CRAZZZIERRRR (get my point?)

But i like MacDonald's(hungry)reminder of prayer..

"... 'But if God is so good as you represent Him, and if he knows all that we need, and far better than we do ourselves, why should it be necessary to ask Him for anything?'

I answered, what if the main object in God's idea of prayer be the supplying of our great, endless need- The need of Himself..

Hunger may drive the runaway child home, and he may or may not be fed at once, but he NEEDs his mother more than his dinner. Communion with God is the one need of the soul beyond all needs...We must ask that we may receive : but that we should receive what we ask in respect of our lower needs, is not God's end in making us pray, for He could give us everything without that: to bring His child to his knee, God withholds that man may ask.
Blessed is the one who desires Him rather than what He gives." ---George MacDonald

He said to them, "When you pray, say:
'Father,
hallowed be your name,
your kingdom come.
Give us each day our daily bread.
Forgive us our sins,
for we also forgive everyone who sins against us.
And lead us not into temptation.' Luke11:2-4

hallowed-let ur name be regarded as holy.It's not so much a petition as it is an act of worship; the speaker,by his words, exalts the holiness of God

bread-emblematic here of all our physical needs -shelter, clothing,transportation,money,etc. It also underlines the basic uncertainty of our temporal life

--the expositor's Bible Commentary, p 947

2009-10-19T22:37:00.000+08:00

haha video link from Jan.
Though wondergals parody is like so cliche but
AWwww... i miss MJ...

ok that's a lie.
but far as i can remb Ann Koh, Mrs Chin, & Vincent Ng all from maths department rocks man!
Suaning skills & the 'zhuai'ness certainly do make lectures more interesting.
not to forget, Karen Ng from econs department rocks too
haha

2009-10-18T00:15:00.000+08:00

i'm like super duper FULL.
I can't sleep now.
The steamboat was fabulous and who would have known the Lees are just so generous (i know), they not only give 'freelunch' but free dinner literally as well.
thanks Mr&Mrs Lee!

Let's just mark this as one of the best days spent fellowshipping with micah-LEE just having BS sharing , cell word , prayer, watching tv, crapping ,burping,snatching each other's seats,eating,lying around doing nothing,whining, suaning each other ,relaxing & dropping-large-quantity-of-hair-carefreely.

Well, that's coz everybody will be really busy like... soon